Sexy Back: October 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
「 dancing away 3:52 AM 」

I shall start penning down my thoughts on this blog again. Hopefully this time round, i am sure of what i am typing.
Objectivity versus Love: Are these 2 mutually exclusive?
Having Objectivity as a principle is essential and useful. Understand the needs and wants, a clear goal in mind, and the guidepost along the ways, would lead one to success in every endeavour. Without objectivity, we would just lose our way and end up doing stuff that we would not have done otherwise.
Love is blind. Whatever actions you do out of love, is out of pure faith. Love is not need, not a want, but more so having an inexplicable feeling to just lay your cards on the table and show it to the other person.
With such a stark difference in mindset, actions and behavior, can we still have these 2 at the same time? Can we be objective in love and can love make us more objective?
Myself: I think for me, love supersedes all objectivity. To the extent, love conditioned my objectivity. It is not a bad thing per se, in fact, it might be considered a good thing, for now i believe what i am doing is right and it is out of love. Call it mushy or stupid or being too caught up If i believe what i am doing is in my best benefit, and i willing accept all consequences, who are you to say i am not objective?
Tonight, i finally found myself again.
It might not have been significantly different for you because it looks like it has been the same routine the whole week.
Me bringing you Koi, resting on your bed while you are watching an anime on the computer, and you sending me back home after.
But, i realize i am actually finding myself back the whole night.
The small talk at the start of the evening, the comfortable comaraderie, the easy relaxation and quiet bantering of words.
I lost all these feeling of comfort so many months ago. Finally, i find myself getting used to the fact i am loving you. It might have been a one-sided kind of comfortableness, but this routine has made me realize why i fell in love in the first place. The feeling of settling down into a routine, the feeling of having you there while i work, and the feeling that i when i turn my head around and look at you, you will always have that cheeky smile on your face, satisfied and feeling comfortable too.
I do not need or want much, but just to let you know that it is enough. Enough that you are giving me this routine to remember why i love someone in the first place.
And right now, i love you.
Love > Objectivity.